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Sombre Thoughts

Think it, Write it…

My friend

I don’t see him everyday. I don’t talk to him all the time and yet he’s always in the back of my mind. It’s not love. I don’t know him that well, but he feels like home.

In a world that is so cold and hateful, he makes me feel loved. I haven’t felt loved in a long time. It’s crazy to think that this one person could mean so much to me, even though I barely know him.

His smile is so contagious. His laugh gives me butterflies. I’m certain that we were meant to meet. We are two people who were meant to change everything we think we know about being appreciated.

I appreciate him. It’s not love. He makes me feel the ‘warm fuzzies’, not in a sexual way. My feelings are strictly platonic, but I must admit, when we’re apart, I can’t wait to see him again.

My friend, you are so dear to me. If only you knew that to me, someone who has felt so unloved and so unwanted, you are so special and you fill the void that has plagued my heart.

My friend, this is for you and the sad thing is that you will never know just how dear to me you really are.

– Stacey-Leigh Laycock

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Writer’s Desires

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– Stacey-Leigh Laycock

United as One

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– Stacey-Leigh Laycock

A whole soul

You made me feel something that I’ve never felt before. You warmed my cold heart and touched my dying soul and woke it from its seemingly endless slumber. You filled the hole inside my heart and now it belongs to you. Is this love? Giving up all that you are to one person. If love means giving up everything for you then strip me of all that I am and leave me bare, but never stop loving me. If I lose you then I will lose myself as well.

Stacey-Leigh Laycock

Thoughts about love…

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Stacey-Leigh Laycock

The Mask

Hide… that’s what you do. You hide away from the world because they don’t approve of who you are. Why do you even bother? No matter how hard you try, you will never be good enough for society and its sinister mistress… life.

Life is both a blessing and a curse, because you are subjected to the constant beatings and ‘bad luck’, with a hint of serendipity every now and then. You tirelessly move through life wishing for it to be over. You look at the mirror and hate what you see, whether it’s your hair, body, teeth, face, or maybe just you as a whole.

You hate yourself so much that you would cover your face with a mask. Your mask is your real friend. It’s the one thing you never leave home without. You put it on to conceal who you really are, in hopes of ‘fitting in’. In this process you kill the person you are and breed a new, empty and lifeless kind of person that the world will love.

In the end the world will tell you not to change who you are, but if you don’t then the world will hate you regardless. That is the truth about life. It will eat you up and spit you out and still have the nerve to ask you why you’re so broken. Your mask acts as your glue, holding the shattered pieces together, but not even a mask can hide the damage that is buried behind the facade.

Stacey-Leigh Laycock

Love Story

I love songs about love,

But I could never write about something

As dark and twisted as

Love…

Stacey-Leigh Laycock

The Animal

With swift and graceful movements he runs with the rhythm of the Earth. He moves so quickly that it appears as though he is hovering above the surface. Like a ghost he is there, but he is also not there. He remains unseen and unheard. He awaits the call of someone with a spirit similar to his own. He longs for a soul who can fill the hole in his dying heart. He has spent a lifetime waiting for the one who could save him. Until then, he roams this Earth, causing havoc and destruction wherever he goes. No one has yet to tame the beast inside him. No one has yet to free the animal from the wretched cage in which he is trapped. The cage of life.

– Stacey-Leigh Laycock 

Kissed by an angel

I was always told that I am cold-hearted and I was always content with that. Many said I was both beautiful and cold, like snow. I always thought I was strong, cold and guarded, until I met you. You appeared one day and changed everything.

With one look you made me weak, with one word you broke down my walls and with one touch you warmed my heart. You wrapped your protective arms around me and made me feel safe.

You melted my ice heart and from that, flowers began to grow. The moment our lips touched, the flowers bloomed and so did I. I, in that moment, was brought to life and I will spend the rest of this life loving you.

– Stacey-Leigh Laycock

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